Feeling first. It sounds like a slogan but it's meant as a mandate.
Feeling first is a theme you will hear echoed throughout this
book in case studies, self-disclosures, and a variety of reviews,
all of which are intended to illustrate the absolute primacy of
feeling in human experience.
In a world where very few absolutes truly apply, feeling is
absolutely primary because it is always feeling we are after. Always.
Whatever we take as our aim, as the object of our desire,
it is always the feeling that matters, despite the persuasive (and
they are often very persuasive) ways in which we are encouraged
to otherwise see or conceive the simple truth of the matter.
Say, for instance, it is success we take as our goal, or a
partner, recognition, money, power, or perhaps a discovery that
will carve out our name in the annals of history forever - still it
is the feeling that we are after.
For if we ask ourselves why, why it is we want whatever it is that we want,
the answer is always rooted in a very simple truth that points ever to the primacy of
That is to say, when we covet a thing, whether
concrete or abstract, what we are invariably coveting is never
the thing itself, but rather the way in which we imagine that
thing, if acquired or achieved, will make us feel.
In other words, we covet feeling, not things. And yet despite this rather obvious
fact, how often are we persuaded to marginalize the role of feeling in our ordinary, daily lives?
And finally, what effects, if any, has and does this marginalization of feeling have upon the environments we create for ourselves personally, inter-personally and globally?